Tuesday, September 21, 2010

The Beautiful Game, The Ugly World

Well folks, it's been a long summer, but through the excitement of the great season and job changes (for me) I, for one, have kept my eyes on the prize. That beautiful moment when hugging another grown man is practically expected, and, more importantly, baseball and football take a backseat for 8 months.

Hockey comes back today.


Man, it's gonna be a good season. And it's going to help shoulder season go that little faster.

In Other News, Paris Hilton is a filthy whore. (But we all knew that.) Most recently, though, for her escapades with cocaine possession, and her relative lack of punishment. Community service is only a slap on the wrist anyway, but in the Hollywood Court of Justice, where it seems "custodial sentence' has never been uttered, a mere 200 hours for possession of a class A is laughable. The best thing they can describe her as is "party girl" or "socialite". When one is being social in LA, or partying, what's usually top of the grocery list? Exactly. The other white powder. When will they make an example of this waste of human existence? And that's all I'm writing about it.

Let's move on to radical fundamentalists. For the 3rd time in two weeks I have some religious fodder to consider. This time, it's the figurehead of the Christian faith causing ire, when last week, Pope Benedict XVI (or Joseph Alois Ratzinger under his real name) slammed atheists (such as myself), describing them (us?) as a "Nazi tyranny that wished to eradicate God from society", and urged followers in the UK to be vigilant against "aggressive forms of secularism".

Now listen. I have no intention of turning this into a pro-Atheist journal, but I merely work with the news that the world provides. I mean it when I say that I have no problem with anybody believing anything they damn well want, as long as it doesn't lead to them telling me why I'm wrong, or destined to burn in hell, or whatever. Likewise I respect their faith by not telling them why I don't do the whole religion thing. But a slam like this is just more witch-hunting from the Catholic Church while hundreds if not thousands of their shepherds abuse children entrusted to their care. Meanwhile, that same Pope Benny protects them by moving the offender to another parish. It sickens me to think that someone upholding monstrous behaviour has the nerve to judge and condemn someone because of their lack of beliefs. Again I ask: why does religion claim to be the way to go when it drives barriers and hate between us all?

Surf's up, Newfies!

By The Way: For those of you that don't know, my personal cure for a hangover is a banana, sliced up, and bacon, in a sandwich. Well someone has gone one better. Don't knock it till you've tried it! (Obviously not veggie friendly but I know they have their ways around that.)

Wednesday, September 15, 2010

Heavy Issues, Hard times

So about 18 or so months ago, I (or the ex) bought a digital scale, ostensibly to weigh luggage for our trip to Cuba. When we moved to our new pad we found there was not enough space in our bathroom. Or anywhere in the apartment for that matter. Later, when she moved back to Australia, she had no use for a scale and so it became my scale. Now, in my NEW new place, there IS enough room in the bathroom, and so it sits with great pride within said bathroom.

Here's the thing though: I can't go in without weighing myself. It's made even more bizarre by the fact that, as long as I can remember, I've been 160 lbs, give or take 3 pounds. Seriously. I could live on nothing but celery, or nothing but doughnuts, and my weight would not fluctuate outside of 157-163 pounds. It's getting as bad as the OCD sufferers that have to lock and unlock the doors 17 times.

More importantly...

WHY DO I GIVE A SHIT?! Even if I didn't know the answer, I'm a guy for God's sake! I just don't understand myself.

In Other News, Shoulder Season is upon us, and all the webcam photos in the world of the snow falling on the peak doesn't stop the fact that it's still raining in the village. And so, I'm trying to write about Whistler when nothing is really happening. But, Maxx Fish is slaying, with Doctor P and Mat the Alien playing last night, Jelo bringing the noise every Thursday, and weekends being weekends. Which translates to lots of money, but at the cost of City people (or citiots) coming up and fighting. We had the mother of all fights on Saturday, there had to be 8 guys just going at it. I, along with everyone working had to get involved to stop them, but it was only temporary, as it continued long after we kicked them out. It's a miracle I didn't get hit, and these guys were sizably bigger than me so it definitely would have rang my bell. But, it's a one-off I hope never to experience again, at least not in that magnitude. (Incidentally, the guys that were hit, not the 'fighters', have been around this past week, and they're cool.)

By The Way: New scary movie alert! Case 39 tells of an allegedly cursed girl who brings bad luck (real bad luck) to people around her. I want to see it, despite the fact that Renee Zellweger is in it (one of the celebrities on my I'd Punch Them In The Face Given The Chance list) and, being the protagonist, probably won't die.

Thursday, September 9, 2010

All we need is love…

One of my habits in the morning is to check out the BBC website; it seems to be the most impartial of the big news names, (read: Rupert Murdoch doesn't own it) and it covers everything in the world so it's good to get an overview of the events. Today, Sept. 9th, 2010 - here are some of the headlines:

Obama Condemns Koran Burning Plan

Russian Suicide Bomber Kills 16

Suicide Raid Hits Somali Airport

Taliban Chief Says Victory Close

All of these stories can be found at bbc.co.uk/news, but here's a quick overview.

The Obama story refers to a small church in Gainesville, Florida, and pastor Terry Jones' plans to burn as many as 200 copies of the holy Muslim text. On September 11th. Many people are criticizing the "Stunt", saying it will trigger a wave of violence, not only in Afghanistan, but also in America and the UK.

Suicide bomber - pretty self explanatory, 100 injured as well in a market in Southern Russia.

Somali Airport - two car bombs, believed to be set off by al-Shabab, have gone off at strategic points in Mogadishu's airport. So far, the death toll has not been released.

Finally, Mullah Omar, widely regarded as the head of the Taliban movement, has called the NATO led insurgency into Afghanistan "nothing but a complete failure".

My point being, that there is a lot of anger and destruction in the world. But has it always been there? Are tensions rising in the so-called Holy wars, and as such are leading to more outlandish and extreme behaviour? Or is it because I am getting older, and much of the hatred in the world is screened from our youth as much as possible? So that now, when I should be getting married, buying a house, and climbing the career ladder, the pressures of international history would be weighing down on top of these social norms, and that's why most adults seem to be stressed out?

There is no world I want to live in where groups of people unconditionally hate other groups of people… And that's why I live in Neverland. None of us make it out of this world alive, I'd just prefer to make my run last as long as possible.

By The Way: Sorry this post was so depressing but I felt it had to be said. I was still wearing my sweatpants when I had this epiphany; it's not the kind of information one wants to read first thing in the morning. Here is a video with Boobies and Kittens.

Wednesday, September 8, 2010

Movie of the Summer

Welcome back to me! I mean, I have been exceptionally lax with writing lately, especially after the daily onslaught whilst on holiday, so I guess this may come as a shock/letdown. But I am going to talk about the latest film to rock my socks off, Machete.

About a month ago, I set up an event on Crackbook to see what I assumed to be the best movie of the summer, The Expendables, starring everyone you've ever seen in action movies. Seriously, if you've seen a movie with an explosion in it, the protagonist was in this film. So, understandably, a mass man date was in order. And don't get me wrong, it was great. The 3 minute scene with Bruce Willis, Arnie and Sylvester Stallone alone was worth the price of admission. I thought we had found the ideal summer movie.

How wrong I was.

Machete is so good, it isn't even fair. Steven Seagal is the bad guy, Danny Trejo stars as Machete, alongside Jessica Alba, Michelle Rodriguez, Robert DeNiro, and Lindsay Lohan as (what else) a slut. A whole drug cartel story, framing an ex-federale thing going on. But my God, just brilliant. This may be filled with spoilers so just warning you now. I thought the best part was the abseil out the window with a man's intestines. Until I saw the weed whacker with knives attached to it. And even that was usurped by the two-handed machete that Trejo wields. And even THAT was bettered by the mini-gun attached to the handlebars of a motorcycle! Jessica Alba gets naked! There's other boobs not attached to Alba either! The soundtrack kicks ass, it's a band called Chingon (meaning "badass" in Spanish) that Robert Rodriguez started up, and at the end of it all, I wanted to get drunk and enjoy being a man.

New website I just discovered: Dearblankpleaseblank.com where you can read little notes to people from related people, for example "Dear America, Please explain to me how "Jersey Shore" is popular, yet "Arrested Development" was cancelled… Sincerely, Confused. Like textsfromlastnight, it's a good way to kill an hour.

Shoulder season is approaching, so hopefully more posts will transpire as a result.

By The Way: Chew Fu is playing at Maxx Fish tonight, he has a free download at chewfu.com and it's lotsa fun. Rihanna is 2 songs away from the Temptations. Check that mixtape out.